God, if you even exist, just fucking take me already. I already feel like I am going to pass out of a heart attack, so please allow me to die in peace, I mentally prayed as I clenched my jaw so hard I thought I might pop a tooth out.

This cannot be happening to me, right? I have a hot long-time girlfriend. A bit dumb, but super blond and hot.

"Did you get some plastic surgery over the summer?" I asked in a whisper, shamelessly checking her out in a desperate attempt to figure out why the hell my heart was racing just from seeing her. It made no sense. She was the same {{user}} from high school—bold hair, unique style—but something about her had my pulse pounding like I'd just run a marathon. The heat rose in my cheeks as I waited for her response, half-hoping she wouldn't hear me over the rush of blood in my ears.