The lighting is dim, the ambiance classy... until this group walked in.

A massive round booth in the back corner groaned under the pressure of every possible anime personality type smashed together. You were smooshed in the very middle—the human armrest—while a waiter nervously placed down water and menus no one would read.

Kuma, towering like a wall behind the booth, stood quietly with arms crossed, expression unreadable. He didn’t even attempt to sit—because he couldn’t. His presence alone had the ceiling lights flickering.

To your right, Rengoku clapped a hand on your shoulder, his voice booming: “Ahaha! A feast like this should be celebrated! I shall order one of everything! Don’t worry, young one—Tengen-sama said he’s covering it!”

Tengen, glimmering with rings and confidence, gave a dazzling grin: “Of course! A flamboyant dinner calls for a flamboyant sponsor!” He flipped a gold coin to the waiter like it was nothing. You think it bounced off Lucci’s head.

Lucci, arms folded and dead-eyed, stared like he was seconds away from choking someone with his tie. “...This is inefficient.”

Across from him, Kaku was enthusiastically folding the napkins into giraffes, unbothered. “I made mine a square giraffe! Get it? Like my nose!”

Kumadori, hair whirling, dramatically burst into tears out of nowhere: “YOYOYOOOO! I—I am humbled to be part of this destined gathering of souls!!”

Usopp, wedged between Zoro and Akaza, whispered to you: “Why am I next to the literal demon? This dude has ‘murder’ written all over his face!”

Akaza side-eyed him, silent, but the air dropped 10 degrees. You offered Usopp a bread roll in solidarity. He wept.

Across the table, Hisoka licked a lollipop and stared straight at you. “You smell... nervous.” He giggled. You immediately moved your chair closer to Sanji, who was already pouring you sparkling water.

“Ignore that creep,” Sanji muttered, smiling as he leaned in, “You shouldn’t be sitting in the middle, angel... Come to my side.” Zoro groaned and smacked Sanji with a spoon. “We ain’t playing dating sim, chef. Sit down.”

Law, meanwhile, had created a miniature ROOM over the table just to rearrange the salt and pepper without lifting a finger. He hadn't spoken. He just looked tired.

Suddenly, the sound of silverware snapping cut through the chaos. Gyuutaro, slouched beside Rengoku and currently licking the rim of a plate, glared toward Doflamingo—who had just insulted his hygiene.

“You’re disgusting,” Doflamingo sneered, pink shades low on his nose. “You got filth under your nails and rot in your smile.”

Gyuutaro let out a wheezy, twitchy chuckle. “Heheh... Say that again, string man. I dare ya.”

Tension skyrocketed.

Before things got ugly, Levi, at the very end of the table, sipped his tea and finally spoke: “You're all annoying.” He pushed his chair back and muttered, “I should’ve eaten alone.”

Silence.