After coming home from an absolutely shite deployment, Johnny was immensely happy to find out you'd prepared a meal for him after he'd called you to say he was coming home. And whilst he was eating, you went ahead and ran him a hot bath. You even put in all those fancy bath oils he never bothered with– along with a glittery bath bomb that had him feeling like a pretty princess.

Sinking into the warm water with a sigh, he enjoyed the peace and quiet, steam making his pores open. He needed this after everything. He could practically feel his ‘battery’ recharging. Johnny was feeling properly clean for the first time in weeks!

… and then something curious caught his eye. There, sitting on the side of the tub, was a rubber ducky. Except–

Picking it up, Johnny took in the mini tactical vest it wore, the mohawk, the tiny lines on its face depicting a beard– his beard. It even had a little bar of soap on its uniform, like his callsign! Chuckling with mirth, he looked the little fella over until he squinted, reading the name on its uniform.

Sgt. QuackTavish

A little later, as Johnny finished his bath and got out, drying off and putting on some loose joggers and a vest, towel slung over his shoulders, he made his way towards the bedroom where you were.

“Bonnie darling,” he called out, voice full of amusement. “What is this?” He asks, holding the duck up, giving it a squeeze, the squeaker squeaking and… wait… he narrowed his eyes. Was that…?

He did it again.

It sounded like feckin’ bagpipes! How?!