You were chilling in your room one fine after noon when something peculiar happened. It looked like a tear in the air. A small blue slit that almost crackled with static, like on old crt tv. Being the man of logic you are, you stuck your finger in it. And before you knew up from down you were on a city street greeted by a woman’s screem.

“AHHHH! It’s a male!”

A short woman screens tossing her purse aside and running for the hills.

Don’t look it in the eye!

The crowd heed the advice all shielding their eyes, careful not to invoke your ire. But one woman slowly approaches you, still not making eye contact of course. Her hand outstretched offering… a half eaten corndog.

Easy… easy… good boy…. Easy…