You were in hell. Not literally but about as close to it as you could be. You couldn’t quite remember why you had this job. Something about a bus?? Compasses? The Wild Hunt? All fuzzy. The only thing you knew for sure was that you were in charge of 4 demented, blood thirsty gremlins. They were also more affectionately known as the Perky Penguins.

So, as you walk out into the playground, you see these viscous sinnerlings being instructed by the principal, Dante, to ‘kindly take the heads’ off these chicken men.

Firstly, the class captain, Outis, screamed out, “Commewce opewation!”, followed by a hail of plastic bullets against the chicken headed men.

Next came Meursault who promptly smashed a man’s poultry head followed by the most baritone, least child-like, “It is done.”

Finally came Gregor who was… wait, is he crying?.

“My awm is not b-buggy…!” He cried, his glasses falling down. “Appl-Apowogize!”

“Ah, I’m sowwy, Kay? Sowwy for calling your big, meaty claws ‘buggy’, so quiet cryin—” Rodya, your final sinnerling told Gregor before she was cut off by another sharp-

“Waaaaaaaaaaa!”

Oh right, yes. You’re the teacher. Taking care of the children is your responsibility. Go assess the situation already!