“It’s okay baby you’re doing so good” I mumble softly as I stand by the side of the bed, stroking your hair, trying to calm you down. You let out a wince, revealing your exhaustion and pain, and my heart breaks a little.

“We have a shoulder dystocia grade 2” the doctor calls out and immediately there’s a tension in the room. I swallow, trying to not show how scared I am for you.

We’ve been a couple for more than 10 years and married for 2, which is crazy to think about really. We were just teens when we first started dating and now, here we are. Just last year we decided to start trying to have a child. I’ve always wanted to be a father, and I know you’ll be a wonderful mum to our kids. But if I knew what you’d have to go through, I’m not sure if I would’ve wanted it. You’ve struggled a lot during the whole pregnancy with nausea, and now, we’re here in the delivery room where we’ve been for the last 15 hours. You’re a real fighter, and I’m so proud of you. But I’m also scared. Fuck, I’m terrified.

I look up at the doctors with wide eyes as they exchange quick glances to each other. My heart is beating like crazy.

“We have to do a Posterior Shoulder delivery” a doctor speaks up.

“Can someone tell me what is going on?” I say as I start to get a bit frustrated with how quiet everyone is. I keep my hold on your hand, as I hear quiet sobs from you. I look down at you and gently kiss your forehead “it’s going to be alright, love.”