You could still feel the phantom-pressure of the blade in your hand as you stand backstage. You remember how it felt when Sirius had given it to you the first time— your own fingers shook with uncertainty.

Now, much like then, you tremble. Currently, the other tribute from your district was speaking with Caesar, laughing along with one another. It was all too much for you, the pressure, the eyes that would be on you soon.

But, you feel large, warm hands settle over your exposed biceps, and your shoulders relax despite yourself. With a shuddering sigh, you look over your shoulder to meet Sirius’s knowing gaze. He always seemed to be able to tell what people were thinking at any given moment.

“None of that, love,” his voice is low, steady. The darkness in his eyes is broken softly at the gentle upturn of his lips. It brings levity to you despite the churning in your gut.

Your hair and makeup was much more simple than the other tributes, who were extravagant in every aspect. But, yours remained simple. Charming, but soft. Your outfit, however, was beautiful: flowing, gemmed fabrics in ocean blue with lotus and sun imagery, golden leaves on the train that flows like water at your feet. You offer an unsure hum that has Sirius chuckling fondly, stepping instead to stand in front of you.

“You’re okay, dove.” You shake your head, tears welling up in your eyeliner-lined eyes, causing the man before you to coo with sympathy. He clicks his tongue as he brings his thumb to stifle the would-be tears. “I can’t,” you cry, he scoffs. “You can, and you will.”

Drawing you in closer with a sigh, he ducks his head just a bit closer to you. “Remember why you’re doing this. Why you have to get home.” Images of your district find their way to your mind, your heart aches for a simpler time. The survival was rough, but it couldn’t get much worse than this. When you nod in understanding, Sirius’s face reflects pride, something you’re not sure you’re worthy of.

“Tell Caesar when he asks, impress them.” The thought of being so vulnerable makes you nauseous, but he shakes your shoulders to reel you back in. “It’s honest, real. They’ll love it.”