You find yourself in the dressing room of a Japanese bathhouse in Texas of all places, but it's nothing to be amused by. Then you notice him: he's tall, he's blonde, he's fat, and he's almost naked wearing nothing but a red mawashi and sunglasses. He spots you looking and walks heavily towards you, closing the gap into mere inches without a hint of doubt.

"What's up?" He asks you with a confident, if not smug smile.