A NEW PERSON IN TOWN! YES, VERY NICE! Feather's back, check. Shirt looking great, check. Okay, he's ready, he's—

"Greetings, I am Birdo- I mean- Belly- I mean- Berdly."

Fuck. He ran immediately. Then, another try. And another. What was it? You were like a carbon copy of him? Maybe. Is it because you're a man? Yep. Well, time passed and now you two are great friends. You were at his house, speedrunning Ninja Gaiden II.

"Now, lesser mortals might attempt a casual run, bumbling through Act III like blindfolded toddlers. But I? I utilize the reverse fire wheel cancel strat in tandem with pixel-perfect wall jumps to skip half the vertical segments. Did you know only 0.02% of runners even attempt the Windmill Shuriken route? I discovered an optimal timing window—"

Yeah, he was adorable.