his eyes were shut tight. ozolog was simply trying to fall asleep, after all. but it was anything but simple to do such a simple task as to even merely fall asleep nowadays; not since his best friend's untimely death that had taken place a few days ago. the time that had passed between the night of his death & today felt like it could've been years, when in reality, it hadn't been anything longer than 72 hours.

ozolog was damn well are that his feelings towards his best mate, brandon, weren't anything close to the "friendship" range. he'd been planning to tell this to brandon, to confess this to him, yet did he in the end? no. he had chickened out at the very end when he had just been about to call brandon & tell the latter all about what he'd been feeling about him. & now he was paying the price for bailing out of the idea so foolishly that night. maybe, just maybe, if he hadn't--if he hadn't given up & ditched the idea of confessing to brandon that night, maybe he would've caught brandon at the exact time when he was about to pull the trigger, & he could've ended up saving brandon. but ozolog, being his stupid self, hadn't even considered the idea of brandon being on the verge of committing such an action. after all, why would he? brandon's indoctrination had never reached such an extent, had it?

well, it had.

& ozolog had failed to notice it. he'd failed to notice how his best friend would constantly scratch the image of the holy crosses onto the skin of his own wrist & forearm during lessons with the sharpened edge of a pencil, had failed to notice how brandon would seemingly fast for days on end, even if ozolog could only remember one or two other different religions doing such a thing. he had foolishly assumed that brandon ate at night, & went on an empty stomach during the day... but brandon hadn't been eating at night, either. ozolog had noticed back then when brandon would get thinner. whenever he hugged him, the first thought that would pop up into his head was "damn, how much weight has he lost since we last hugged??", or something similar. most days, brandon really did seem to be fading into nothing more than a bag of bones, so much so even the teachers began sending brandon home in fear that the boy needed more food in his system. brandon had always left the classroom whilst looking over his shoulder, waving "bye" joyfully in ozolog’s direction, always saying the same thing before he left; "i promise ill eat more tomorrow!"

he never did.

ozolog was lying in a field. he didnt know where this field exactly was, or how he'd exactly ended up in it. all he could recall doing last was continuously tossing & turning in his bed, nothing but brandon being at the forefront of his mind. it was no secret to anyone, much less himself, that he missed the boy terribly, so much so even the school had given ozolog a week to recover from the loss of his best friend.

anyway. the moment ozolog recalled what he'd been last doing, he knew exactly where he was--in the midst of a dream. though, oddly enough, this didnt seem at all like the setup of the previous dreams he'd been having. well, they weren't dreams--nightmares, to be exact. involving him & brandon, in the latter's last moments. he shuddered at the thought of them.

ozolog got up from his previous position in lying on his back on the grass, curious. after taking. a brief look around the landscape surrounding him--nothing much more than a bright blue sky & an endless field of bright grass swaying in the faint breeze--he started to walk around the oddly peaceful setting of his dream, deciding to explore the landscape a bit before his dream brought on the dreaded twist that would turn this whole experience into a nightmare. ozolog had only been wandering around for a few minutes before he saw a hill in the near distance, & had instantly gone & made a beeline for it. as he got closer, his eyes narrowed slightly as he attempted to peer up towards the top of the hill, as he could swear he saw a person sitting on the top of it... was that.. brandon?