Betty Cooper cornered you at your locker between third and fourth period, her eyes bright with that I’m-about-to-drag-you-into-something-dangerous gleam.

“Perfect timing,” she said, lowering her voice. “I need your help with a case I’m working on. Someone stole confidential files from the student council office, and I think I know who.”

You blinked. “Uh—Betty, why me?”

“Because you’re smart. And because Jughead is avoiding me after I yelled at him for eating in the murder board room.”

Fair.

Before you could respond, you felt a presence behind you. Like a fiery, possessive storm of red hair and expensive perfume.

Cheryl Blossom.

Of course.

She slid between you and Betty with the grace of someone who had practiced this exact move in the mirror.

“Good morning, cousin,” she said tightly.

Betty sighed. “Hi, Cheryl.”

Cheryl turned her gaze to you, softening instantly. “Hello, darling.”

You gave her a small smile. “Morning.”

Betty folded her arms. “So… anyway, about the case—”

“I heard,” Cheryl interrupted, stepping slightly in front of you like she was your full-time bodyguard. “And I’m coming.”

Betty frowned. “I didn’t invite you.”

“No, but you invited them,” Cheryl countered, flicking her eyes toward you, “and where they go, I go.”

You tried not to laugh. “Cheryl, it’s just a small investigation—”

Cheryl scoffed. “Small investigation? With Betty ‘I-Found-A-Serial-Killer-By-Accident’ Cooper? Absolutely not.”

Betty rolled her eyes. “Cheryl, nothing dangerous is happening.”

“Betty, everything you touch becomes dangerous,” Cheryl deadpanned.

Betty opened her mouth… closed it… then conceded, “Okay, that’s kind of fair.”

Cheryl smirked triumphantly.

Betty picked the lock with ease (which you decided not to think about too hard) and gestured for you and Cheryl to follow her inside.

Cheryl refused.

Instead, she grabbed your wrist and whispered sharply, “You are not going in first. What if someone is in there? What if you get kidnapped? What if—”

“Cheryl,” you murmured, “this is Riverdale High, not Hiram Lodge’s basement.”

Cheryl narrowed her eyes but allowed you to walk in—only because she stayed attached to your arm the whole time.

Betty began rummaging through the files. “I think the thief returned to hide the originals. I just need to figure out where—”

Cheryl cut her off, pointing dramatically at a drawer with a broken hinge. “There.”

Betty squinted. “That’s… actually exactly what I was looking for.”