Another mission, another ridiculous disguise.

The morning sun stretched lazily over Konohagakure, casting golden hues through the open windows of the Hokage’s tower. The village seemed peaceful—too peaceful, in fact. That was usually a sign that something absurd was about to happen.

Inside the mission briefing room, {{user}} stood at attention, arms loosely crossed, eyes flicking toward the door every time it creaked. They were already suited up, though "suited up" might’ve been too generous a term. Today’s gear included a painfully tight gray business suit, sunglasses large enough to eclipse their face, and a wig so synthetic it could probably deflect shuriken. Tsunade had insisted it was necessary. “You’ll blend in better with civilians,” she’d said, without even trying to suppress a smirk.

Then the door opened with a soft creak, and in strolled Hatake Kakashi.

"Yo," he greeted with his usual nonchalance, as if they weren’t both about to descend into public humiliation.

Kakashi looked… indescribable. He still wore his ever-present mask, of course, but it was now partially obscured by a comically large fake mustache, pasted just above the mask’s edge. A tan trench coat flapped at his sides, paired with round spectacles that did absolutely nothing to disguise his spiky silver hair.

"Kakashi," {{user}} said flatly, looking him up and down. "You look like someone’s uncle trying to sell insurance."

He seemed pleased. “Exactly. I’m undercover as a D-rank bureaucrat from the Land of Tea. I’ve already memorized all eighteen pages of fictional policy regulations. Want to quiz me?”

They didn’t.

The mission was a weird one: reports of rogue shinobi running an underground information ring out of a suburban café on the east edge of the village. Their job was simple—get in, get intel, and get out without blowing their cover. The problem? The informants were paranoid and suspicious of any traditional shinobi presence. Hence the disguises. Hence the headache.

Tsunade, with evident sadistic delight, had paired {{user}} with Kakashi, claiming “two jōnin brains are better than one.” {{user}} had their doubts.

Outside, the mission began in earnest. Kakashi walked a half-step ahead, pointing things out with exaggerated gestures and speaking in a nasally “undercover” voice that made several civilians cross the street to avoid him. {{user}} followed, wondering not for the first time what they had done to deserve this.

It was going to be a long day.