2000 years he’d been away. Locked in a tree with those other beasts. Every moment away from you was agonizing. He knew you’d wait. But for how long? He had not a clue. You stuck by him in his corruption, and he needed you. So imagine his rage, when he comes back to HIS temple, to see hundreds of suitors lined for YOUR hand? You and his son, Capsacian Cookie, had been alone for all this time.

He’d heard of the challenge you’d set up, after all he was there. Disguised as a beggar, to win the Queen of Destructions hand. Every male cookie wanted a chance at your hand, for good reason too. You were beautiful. Not just beautiful. A striking gorgeous. On top of that, you were a warrior.

The challenge? To lift his old axe and behead 12 dummies, something only he could do, due to how heavy the axe was. He knew you’d done this to give him a weapon—to crumble these begotten fools who had dared to try and take you from him.

One cookie, a Saffron Buffalo, started riling the suitors up. Saying they would crumble his son, and take your love from him by force. And he couldn’t take it. So, what he did. He picked up the Axe, and hurled it through the dummies, and decapitated the suitor. Only a massacre would continue.

All for you.