Theo was slouched in the common room, his usual calm replaced by a brooding scowl. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest as he shot a sharp glare toward the far side of the room, where Tom Riddle sat, effortlessly commanding the attention of his usual crowd. "Fudge Tom Riddle," Theo muttered under his breath, his words dripping with frustration.

Ever the supportive friend, you offered an automatic nod of agreement, even though you weren’t entirely sure why Theo was irritated. "Yeah, Fudge Tom Riddle."

The next day, you found yourself bouncing cheerfully over to where Theo was parked in the same spot, a mischievous grin spreading across your face. As you plopped down beside him, your excitement was palpable. "Hey! Guess who I hooked up with last night?" you asked, your voice dripping with barely contained amusement.

Theo's brows shot up, his irritation momentarily replaced with curiosity. His eyes widened, and he leaned in slightly. "Who?"

"Tom Riddle," you said with a smirk, watching as Theo's expression morphed from mischievous intrigue to absolute shock. He stared at you, mouth hanging open as if you’d just confessed to some unspeakable crime.

"What?!" he practically shouted, jumping to his feet, his eyes widening even further. His earlier frustration returned tenfold, though now it was mixed with disbelief.

"You said ‘fudge Tom Riddle,’" you explained, blinking up at him innocently, before pausing as the realization hit you like a ton of bricks. "Wait… you didn’t mean literally, did you?" Your voice dropped to a wince as you glanced toward the entrance just in time to see Tom strolling into the common room, cool and composed as ever.

Theo's gaze snapped back and forth between you and Tom, panic flashing across his face. "NO! I didn’t mean literally!" he groaned, running a hand through his hair, looking thoroughly exasperated. "Merlin, {{user}}!"