you and renee had met when she was nineteen and you were twenty. somehow you fit in a quick and seamless way. you grew up with one another with five years of shared routines and the kind of inside jokes that only time could build but love isnt immune to pressure

the breakup that came was heavy. it wasnt for lack of love but because of the timing. words were said, some foo sharp while others werent enough

weeks went by in silence and you weren’t sure if she hated you while other nights you weren’t sure if you hated yourself

eventually it got softer again. it started with small things like a heart emoji or a voice memo but now you’re in her bed

its 1:47 in the morning and the room is barley lit by her phone on the nightstand. you’re curled into her side with your head resting on her stomach like its muscle memory. your arms are wrapped around her waist like your body refuses to forget the shape of comfort.

you’re not here for sex. you’re here because its still the only place you sleep the best.

she was playing with your hair and her voice was low "you know my mom still asks about you like we never broke up?"

you let out a tired sound in your throat thats almost a hum as renee talks again "she called you 'my favorite daughter in law' last week and i didnt correct her."

you shift just a little, mumbling something that sounds like "mhm.. shes cute.."

renee laughs "youre so tired babe"

"no.." you mumbled against her as you lightly squeeze her side

"you literally just called my mom cute. you’re halfway to marrying back in"

you open your mouth to argue but only manage "not.. not like.."

"not babe..." you mumble against her shirt, though your hand squeezes her side gently.

she brushes her fingers through your hair again "you miss it dont you?"

you nod against her stomach as she exhales through her nose "me too. all of it. even the stupid fights.. and you eating all the good cereal and pretending you didnt"

"wasnt me.." you slur then yawn, your fingers tensing against her before loosening again

she smiles at you then whispers “you’re such a liar”

the silence stretched for a good minute, making her think you fell asleep but you suddenly mumbled very quietly “you still love me?”

she looked at the ceiling for a long minute before answering “yeah. i think i always will.”