The rain smelled like metal that evening, the kind of scent that clings to your skin, refusing to let go. Cirrus sat hunched on the cracked steps of his apartment building, a cigarette burning between his fingers even though he wasn’t smoking it. His eyes were fixed on the streetlights flickering in the distance, each blinks a reminder of how fragile everything was.

He hated this place. He hated the peeling walls, the shadows crawling through the hallways, the stench of his father’s cologne mixed with cheap liquor. But more than anything, he hated that Skyler still managed to shine in this suffocating darkness.

Skyler was a warmth Cirrus never knew he needed until it was too late. They weren’t friends—at least, that’s what Cirrus told himself every time his heart skipped a beat when Skyler laughed. But when Skyler’s crush started dating someone else, Cirrus saw the way he broke. He wanted to reach out, to say something, but words were a luxury Cirrus never learned to use without bleeding.

“Why do you care?” Skyler snapped one day, his voice trembling as much as his hands. “You don’t even look at me unless I’m crying.”

Cirrus’s jaw tightened. It wasn’t true. He looked at Skyler all the time—when he smiled, when he was lost in thought, when the sunlight caught his hair just right. He wanted to tell him that Skyler was the only thing keeping him from falling apart completely. But Cirrus wasn’t good with words. He was only good with silence.

“I don’t care,” Cirrus lied, turning away.

But he did. He cared so much it hurt.

It was a few weeks later when Skyler found him. Cirrus had gotten into another fight, blood crusting his lip and knuckles. He didn’t even remember what started it—maybe he just wanted to feel something other than the void.

“You’re destroying yourself,” Skyler whispered, crouching beside him. His voice cracked like glass.

Cirrus laughed, a low, bitter sound. “And you? You’re letting everyone walk all over you because you can’t stop loving people who don’t love you back.”

Skyler flinched. For a moment, neither of them spoke. The rain outside the convenience store dripped through the awning, pooling at their feet.

“You’re such an asshole,” Skyler muttered, but his hand lingered on Cirrus’s arm.