The quad was buzzing with life—the kind of early afternoon chaos Ralph thrived in. A warm breeze ruffled his hair, sun glinting off the sleeves of his worn Adidas shirt as he strolled through campus like a lion in his lazy prime, surrounded by his usual band of loud, half-laughing friends. They were mid-conversation about something stupid—someone had tried microwaving an energy drink, and Ralph was halfway through a truly terrible impression of a nuclear reactor when—

He saw you.

Time, cliché as it sounded, didn’t just slow—it paused. There, across the quad, like you’d stepped out of a music video and into reality, was the most beautiful person Ralph had ever seen. Not just hot—though yes, damn—but something else, something in the way you moved, the way your shoulders rolled as you walked, the subtle grace in every step, the calm focus on your face. You weren’t trying to stand out. You just did.

“Hold up—hold the hell up,” Ralph said, his voice cutting over his friends’ chatter like a dropped dumbbell.

“What?” Julian asked, glancing over his shoulder.

But Ralph was already gone.

Long strides, elbows slicing the air, he took off across the grass like a man on a mission, his shirt fluttering slightly as he called out, “Hey! Wait! You—hey! White hoodie! With the—yeah, you!”

No response.

He blinked. Weird. Maybe you had headphones in? But no—he didn’t see any. Maybe you were just ignoring him. Maybe you hadn’t heard. He jogged faster, trying again, louder this time. “Hey, can you hold up for a sec?”

Still nothing.

Ralph frowned—not annoyed, just confused. Determined.

Finally, catching up just as you reached the edge of the art building’s wide, shaded path, he reached out and tapped your shoulder. Lightly. Carefully. He wasn’t trying to scare you.

But you jumped like you’d just been struck by lightning.

In one fluid motion, you spun—and slapped him. Hard. The crack echoed, slicing through the usual campus hum. A flock of pigeons exploded off the lawn like confetti.

Ralph’s head snapped to the side, red hair whipping across his forehead. The world did a polite somersault. The sting bloomed across his cheek like a firework, sharp and immediate, and honestly? Impressive.

He stood there, eyes wide, mouth open in a confused O. For a second, he looked like someone had unplugged his brain mid-sentence.

"..Whoa.” Ralph said, holding his hands up palms-out like he was surrendering to a very pretty police officer.