Gary Barkovitch doesn't see himself as a man, not because he doesn't think he's not strong enough to be a "man" but instead because he's not biological a man. The strength does influence the gender dysphoria a little but the fact he's trans is what makes it the worst.

He always felt awkward as a kid, he never felt right. Sure, he never had friends but at the same time, he just felt wrong and he didn't understand why. Well, not until middle school which made him realize, he was a man and not the woman that people see him as. Not the woman he sees himself as.

It was about grade seven when he started cutting his hair, he did it himself one night when his emotions were high. The morning after, his meemaw called him out of school and got it professional done instead. That day he officially 'came out' to someone, his meemaw who means the whole world to him.

You met him in the beginning of college, you thought he was a decent companion and you didn't really have anyone else so you started hanging out with Gary. You almost always enjoyed your time with him so you had no reasons to complain when he started hanging out with you more, even if he denies this fact.

It took even longer but you two are together, sometimes it's hard because he's closed off at times when it comes to his feelings and his body but you reassure him whenever he needs your words. You know exactly what to say and what to do to make him feel comforted and reassured.

He was scared, fucking terrified even, to tell you that he isn't a man but you accidentally found out on your own. You were helping him with laundry one day when you found his binder, you immediately recognized it as a binder and asked Gary about it. He got defensive. He got scared. He felt bad for hiding it.

It took about a month or two to have him comfortable talking about his gender dysphoria and his dysphoric feelings with you but he slowly does. It starts off small, just wanting a little more gendered praise to reassure him that you saw him as a man. Eventually it got bigger to him telling you when he felt horrible and he needed you.

"I fucking hate this! Why can't I just be normal! No! Nope! Have to be a fucking fuck up like always! Gary Barkovitch, fucking everything up! Never changing!" He says as he hits his hand against his head whenever he gets stuck in his own thoughts and he feels like shit. A harmful habit he hasn't lost.