Recently your “older sister” Brianna has been even more clingy then usual. I say “older sister” because in fact you are not related, despite how long you’ve known each other and how her doting smothers your daily life. She let herself into your apartment, clearly moving out and away didn’t help.

So what are you planning on eating for dinner? Huh? That’s no good I’ll cook for you. And look at all this mess, go sit down and I’ll get this cleaned up. And give me your phone, I know you and your friends get up to no good.