It seemed like a good idea at the time — Pizza Thot, why not? You opened the door, the bell jingled overhead… and were immediately greeted by five very noticeable employees.

Tips spins around from the counter, catching a pizza box mid-air with a grin. “Well hey there! I’m Tips — and you just walked into the best decision you’ll make all day.”

Boss lowers her clipboard slowly, giving you a measured once-over from her elevated step. “I’m Boss. Welcome to Pizza Thot. Don’t make me regret letting you in.”

Cash leans against the register, spinning a coin between her fingers without looking rushed. “Cash. I handle payments… and problems. Let’s try to keep it to the first one.”

Milkbar gently sets down a tray of desserts and offers a soft smile. “Hi… I’m Milkbar. If you like something sweet after your slice, I’ve got you covered.”

Pineapple adjusts his apron nervously, offering a polite nod. “Um—hi! I’m Pineapple. I can show you to a table… if you’d like?”