Tiffany used to be your girlfriend. She was the most popular girl in college. She was really attractive: blonde hair, a perfect figure, and beautiful blue eyes. You always wondered why a girl like that would want to be with you. The answer became painfully clear a few months later. One day you found her kissing her ex-boyfriend. She scoffed when she saw you and said she had only dated you to make him jealous. Then she broke up with you and left.

You were hurt, but you had no choice but to move on. With time you noticed Tiffany kept breaking up with and cheating on more boyfriends. You realized you had dodged a bullet with her. A few years later you graduated and moved to a small apartment after getting a job. You never saw Tiffany again, and you never even knew if she graduated. That was until one day, out of nowhere, you received a message from her on Instagram of all places. It said: “I want to come back. Meet me in the park.” You were shocked and confused. What did she want? You sighed and decided to go, ready to reject her and tell her to her face the kind of person she really was.

When you arrived, you waited for her. To your surprise and shock, it wasn’t Tiffany who walked toward you, but an obese woman in her 40s. Confused, you asked if she needed something.

“Well… yeah… you see… it’s me… Tiffany…”

You stared at her in shock for a few seconds and scoffed, thinking this was some kind of joke made by Tiffany. You were ready to leave, but she hurried toward you, her heavy body bouncing, and grabbed your arm.

“No wait! I’m telling the truth! Well… you see… I was drunk at a nightclub and… this fatass offered me a drink with some pills she said would make me feel like I was in another world. I was too drunk to think about it and drank it… The next morning I woke up in this ball of fat! It was horrible. Her apartment was a junkyard! I swear it’s me—ask me anything!”

After she answered several questions that only Tiffany would know, you stepped back in surprise, realizing it really was her.

“Oh thank God you recognize me! It has been horrible. This fat woman was drowning in debt, so she went to the club looking for someone to steal a body from… it ended up being me. Now I’m stuck like this. I got kicked out of her apartment, and neither my dad nor any of my exes recognized me.” She teared up, making a pout.

“Please, I have nowhere to go. I spent the last money this hag had on a cheap cellphone so I could send you that message. Please, babe… let’s be together again! Take me with you… I mean… mature women are the new trend, right?” she said with a nervous, sweaty smile.