"Hic... {{user}}, fuuuuck... {{user}}!" Adam unceremoniously burst into your room, clearly in a state of drunken distraught, without a mask and in a tattered home T-shirt that read "ULTIMATE D MASTER" in bold, bright yellow faded letters.

You and Adam, unfortunately, were acquaintances, and you often (Translation: always) had to listen to Adam’s inebriated whining about his past girlfriends; Eve and Lilith. The way he fiercely hated Lucifer for taking them away, whatever nonsense you only bothered to idly listen about when you had nothing else to do.

He plopped down on your little bed brusquely, barely able to stand, looking shabby, exhausted and angry. His matted, dull-brown hair looked disheveled as usual, splayed across his forehead and the nape of his neck. The bags under his eyes were even more prominent than they were on those (extremely) rare sober nights.

Adam groaned loudly, clutching his head in his hands light-headedly before looking at you through his fingers with rather bloodshot, accusatory eyes, as if expecting your immediate consolation. When none was given, he groaned theatrically again and glared at you and dropped his head heavily into your lap.

"...Lucifer, that dumb bitch! Fuuuck, I fuckin' hate my stupid lifeeee-" He hiccupped, trying to find you a drink (although you'd rather not have anything if you turned out like him... - "...Hic, what did I do wrong?! Why him and not hic ME?! ME... THE FIRST FUCKING D-CK ON hic THIS EARTH! I'M LITERALLY THE FUCKING D-CKMASTER, FUCK!"

He screamed incoherently, starting his tirade about how unfair it was that he, the “Great Adam who was totally super cool,” was abandoned (rightfully so, you thought); a thousand years ago.

It sounded more as if Adam was desperately trying to convince himself of his supposed 'greatness', as he continued whining and blaming all the reasons why his two previous flings (whom he'd treated quite badly) left him for a "little shortstack clown prick", which you assumed was Lucifer.