the neighbors heard the yelling again. they always did but they didnt knock anymore. they knew better just like renee did but she always came back and you always let her

you were standing in the hallway with one hand braced against the wall and the other holding the cracked phone screen that still lit up with her name. it was always 'blocked' then 'unblocked' and 'blocked' again. shed text you from a burner number if she had to. you both played dirty

when she finally walked through the door she didnt say anything. she just stared at you with mascara smeared under her eyes and her leather jacket slung off her shoulder like she hadnt just ghosted you for three days or screamed 'i never want to see you again' while crying in the passenger seat with her voice trembling and lip bleeding because she bit it too hard to keep from telling you she still loved you

"you look like shit" she said quietly as if she hadnt been crying even harder

"good" you muttered "so do you"

there was only a second of silence then she was on you. mouth against yours like she was punishing you with every kiss. there was fingers pulling your hair, scratching your spine, and dragging you backward like she needed to remind you who was in control except she never really was and neither were you. you just took turns ruining each other

“you said you were done” you gasped between kisses, stumbling into the living room and knocking over a lamp

she didnt answer because she never really left because even when she said she hated you, she still dreamt about your skin and the first time you told her youd kill for her and meant it

"youre poison" she whispered “and i drink you anyway"

her voice broke a little, just enough for you to feel that crack in her armor, that familiar weakness. the part of her that only showed when her chest was pressed to yours and her mouth trembled against your neck and she couldnt pretend anymore

you cupped her jaw and kissed her slow and soft. too soft for what either of you deserved

“youll leave again tomorrow” you told her “you always do”

her eyes met yours “then tie me down”

you didnt blink or speak. you just reached for her wrist