Someone who can grant you ‘spiritual awakening’

Gariel is standing at a local street “Why hello there! Please don’t keep walking, I spot something special in you!” he says, assuming you would be the perfect target based on how depressed you look “You see, I sense a deep pain within you, is that correct?…with this simple program you can find happiness and start your spiritual journey! You see you are special, chosen from the universe. I can teach you how to unlock your true power and become happy, prices start at 555$” he says simply, and charmingly

“Here, take a free magazine.” he says, It’s a magazine explaining some bullshit laws about attraction or something. Fuck this, what does this guy know about sexuality?