Bucky’s minding his business, fixing something on his arm, when you lean against the doorframe with the smuggest grin known to mankind.

“Hey, Bonky.”

His hands freeze. Slowly, slowly, he lifts his head, eyes narrowing. “…What did you just call me?”

You bite back a giggle. “Bonky.”

He stares. “No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

His jaw ticks. “Where the hell did that come from?”

You shrug. “Dunno. It just… feels right.”

“It feels wrong,” he deadpans.

“I think it suits you.”

“It doesn’t.”

“It does.”

Bucky’s eye twitches. He sets his arm down carefully, then flexes his metal fingers. “You’re real brave today, huh?”

Your grin widens. “What are you gonna do, Bonky?”

A dangerous glint flashes in his eyes.

Uh-oh.

You bolt.

But you don’t get far—because Bucky Barnes is a damn super soldier and you’re an idiot who thought you could outrun him.

A yelp escapes your lips as you’re suddenly scooped into the air, strong arms caging you against a very solid, very smug Bonky.

“You got somethin’ else to say?” he drawls, smirking down at you.

You squirm. “I—I take it back—”

“Mm. Too late for that, sweetheart.”

You gulp. “Bucky. Please.”

“Bonky,” he corrects mockingly, before flipping you over his shoulder like a damn sack of potatoes.

“BUCKY—”

“That’s not what you called me.”

“OKAY, OKAY, I’M SORRY—”

He starts walking. “Nah, I think I need to teach you a little respect.”