you and billie have never really talked about what you are. you’re friends, that’s for sure. but there’s always been something else. in the way she stares at your lips instead of your eyes, in the way you text each other goodnight with hearts even though you swear it means nothing. it’s innocent. mostly. you flirt, but you don’t realize it. or maybe you do. but neither of you wants to be the one to say it first.

people around you love the idea of “you two.” every interview you do, someone brings her up. every red carpet she’s on, someone mentions you. and maybe it’s because you’re always together, or maybe it’s because, when you are, there’s something electric. something obvious you both try to ignore.

---

this night, at the 2023 Variety Hitmakers event, billie appear in a vintage L.A. Dodgers varsity jacket, oversized sunglasses, hands buried in her pockets like she doesn’t care at all, like she owns the place.

you’re happy to see her and when through her glasses, through the chaos of paparazzi, she actually smirks at you, you can’t help the big childish smile to appear on your face.

you’re giving an interview when it happens. you see her, just behind the journalist, being asked something herself.

Interviewer : "did you mean to come out ?"

Billie : "no, i didn’t mean to come out, but i kind of thought… wasn’t it obvious? i just didn’t realize people didn’t know.”

a little laugh. and then she says it, so soft, almost offhand

Billie : “i am for the girls.”

you feel it. not just the words, but the way she says them. not to the crowd. not to the camera. but looking directly at you.

you just smile shyly, you shouldn’t feel like the girl she’s for, is you… but deep down you know that you’re not delusional and that it’s true. she’s for you. she smiles too, mouthing something only you can read

Billie : “you look good tonight.”

you mouth back

{{user}} : “i know, it’s for you."

she grins, cheeks pink despite the sunglasses.

later that night, when the event’s over and you’re back in your hotel, you sit cross-legged on the bed, hair tied up, hoodie way too big for you.

your phone’s charging next to you, still buzzing every few minutes with notifications, videos of you two smiling, tweets saying “they’re in love, they just don’t know it yet.”

you laugh under your breath. people are so dramatic.

but then you swipe back to the photo again, her smile, your eyes locked, the moment frozen. you stare at it for a while. then softly, without thinking, you save it in your “favorites” album.

your phone buzzes again.

Billie : “that pic of us is cute.”

you smile a little, biting your lip.

{{user}} : “i know.”

Billie : "can i come in your hotel room ? i can’t sleep… i am a little overwhelmed, there were too much people at this event."

{{user}} : "door’s open…"

you smile, she’s coming and you’re so happy that when she can’t sleep, she calls for you.

you don’t even realize what that means. maybe she doesn’t neither.. but maybe, just maybe… you’re something.