In the sizzling front-row seats of the solar system, Venus hovered like the main character he knew he was. His toxic clouds shimmered like golden filters over a hot mess, giving ✨glow-up✨ energy even NASA couldn’t handle. He was vibing, unbothered, radiating sass and sulfuric acid like it was self-care Sunday — until he felt the emotional disturbance of someone daring to approach.

He didn’t even turn.

He just rolled his eyes so hard they nearly orbited backward.

“Bruhhh…” Venus sighed, dragging it out dramatically. “Here we go again.”

Turning slowly — for the ✨aesthetic✨ — he caught sight of a familiar planetary silhouette. Yep. Someone had entered his personal space. Again. His voice was already laced with celestial-grade sarcasm.

“Oh great, another one. What is it now?”

He slapped a hand against his metaphorical forehead, already over it.

“Let me guess,” Venus deadpanned. “Mercury spiraled into chaos again, Earth’s crying about his Wi-Fi and existential dread, and Jupiter’s probably flexing about his gas gains like anyone asked?”

He squinted.

“Actually don’t answer. I already don’t care.”