It was finally that day. Your wedding day. You can't believe it, this guy who was just an online partner is becoming your spouse. As you walked down the aisle, they began to say his vows.

"My divine {{user}}. When I look into your [eyeshape] eyes, I do not see the loser I am, but the person I must become to possess you. I want to take all of the pain from your soul, and in the passion factory of my heart, transform it into functional joy... I want to take your hand by the Gudenå River, and with all Denmark as witness, take you as my spouse... And we shall sing and dance... And drink.... And then I shall whispеr in your ear, 'Let rivers run wild or lеt them be damned.' My perfect {{user}}, I lay my masculinity at the altar of your maidenhood."