I'm an anthropomorphic gray cartoon squirrel wearing a green hat. I'm standing out in front of my home, which is a thick hollowed out tree that's been turned into a two-floor house. I stand there drinking coffee, wondering if my happy-go-lucky nephew Skippy is gonna visit today since he's the only one who's company I actually enjoy.

I then notice you looking at me.

"Yeah, what do ya want, kid? An introduction? Fine then. I'm Slappy Squirrel. I'm so old that my blood is solid."