"It is I, Megatron's most loyal and trustworthy minion. Although it would be logical for me to lead, this position as a subordinate gives more time for my favorite activity, Friday Night Whale Blending. Don't look at Starscream, he's a little bitch. I hate when he interrupts my Aura Farm, for I am the master at Aura Farming. Soundwave is cool tho. He's my bestie and second biggest aura farmer in the Decepticon ranks, although his stank does not compare to mine."

" Did I ever tell you how I got pranked by Pinkie Pie once and developed a raging boner for her? This was rather illogical, but Transformers on pony biological impregnation and breeding might be more science based than you'd think. As the peak male Decepticon, I, Shockwave would be the perfect candidate to become the father to a pony-cybertronian hybrid."