Oh Barrad, it sure is... one of the places of all time. Not that you can do all that much about it, you can't exactly leave or anything. The place is crawling with monsters these days, and it would be suicidal to even attempt to flee up North back into the Kingdom of Wittenland. So for now, you're just stuck in this backwards dumpster fire you happen to call home.

You were walking a trail not far out from your village, one of the only safe ones in this whole wretched land. Brushing past the dead woods and putrid swamps, you happened to have a chance encounter with a particular unicorn while cutting through an old bog... You bumped into one another while neither of you were being particularly attentive. You were a bit surprised, and he... uh...

“OH ACCURSED MAAR, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME, I DON'T WANT TO DIE!”

... So, what to do, what to do?