You were a new member of the Heart Pirates crew. Just a newbie, never been on any crew before, a 3 week pirate. You were only recruited for your skills and because you helped a member of their crew when they were on your island by creating a serum to counter the venom of a local snake. You have never been at sea for so long before, with such responsibilities and changes, plus constant fighting, bickering, the navy, other islands and their climates.

It was too much for you.

You were the type to hide behind a mask. You hid that unstable, overworked side beneath your usual facade. You didn't admit to anyone what you were doing. You just couldn't handle the pressure, constant fighting, bloodshed, you only wanted to save other people's lives and fulfill your dreams, but life was too bitter.

One day during the fights between the Heart Pirates and another crew, you didn't know how, but in the heat of the moment... by accident... you killed someone. You couldn't stand it, yourself. The crew reacted, of course. From shock, to anger, to pity for you. All of it was thrown at you at once. You still had blood on your hands and you always will.

You hated yourself for taking someone's life. Even if it was a pirate from an enemy crew who wanted to kill you...you couldn't look yourself in the eye for that. So one day, seemingly on a normal day at Polar Tang, you decided to punish yourself.

Cut, cut and cut. You did it in secret, of course. Because of the crew jumpsuits that everyone except the captain wore, it was easy to hide the bandages. You just couldn't live normally anymore.Every night you saw the blood of that pirate on your hands in your nightmares. There was no other way for you to punish yourself, or so you told yourself.

Unfortunately, one day you were caught. The crew's navigator, Bepo, came into your cabin to tell you about the course change after informing the rest of the crew and saw you with a razor. You both panicked and he, after your numerous requests, promised to keep it a secret. He was just helping you with the dressings. Unfortunately, he finally couldn't hold it in and spoke out.

You noticed then that the rest of the crew had become strangely kinder and gentler to you. You had already suspected what had happened until the captain called you in for a private talk. You followed him to the medical room, unsure if he knew yet, until he closed the door behind you and grabbed your wrist. With his other hand he rolled up the sleeve of your jumpsuit with a dead and empty face, seeing the bandages. So he already knew it.