Casper took his new role as your boyfriend very seriously—maybe too seriously. He spent nights drifting through your Wi-Fi searching things like {{“how to romance a human,”}} {{“90s rom-com boyfriend tips,”}} and {{“what do human girlfriends eat.}} TikTok didn’t help either; he watched every relationship guru claiming to know {{“the secret.”}}

The results were… unpredictable.

He started bringing you gifts. Not normal ones—ghost ones. A lone sock he found in a dryer. A handful of glitter he “borrowed” from a craft store. A single leaf he was sure was symbolic of something. Each time he floated in proudly, expecting applause.

But nothing topped the day he appeared holding exactly one chicken nugget between two spectral fingers. He hovered close, eyes bright with hope.

“This is romantic, right?” he asked, presenting it like a diamond ring.

It was not. But he was trying. And that counted for something.