“Ugh, you’re such a man.” You spout

Immediately, you use your sock-covered toe to gently kick Eren’s foot over slightly, encouraging him to close his legs from their plant in a “man-spread.”

Your boyfriend, with an offended look and mouth agape, watches as you take your position on his now closed lap, legs draped over the side and your arm wrapping around his neck. You set the bowl of snacks on your lap and bring one of the salty crackers to his open mouth, not even acknowledging his incredulous expression. You gently coax the cracker into his mouth, but he doesn’t bite it quite yet

“Excuse me?” He manages, mouth warbled around the cracker. His tongue prods the cracker in, and he chews it anggreddibely

You shrug, “yeah, like, you man-spread, you’ve got a man bun, you man-splain-“

“When have I ever man-splained something to you?” He grumbles, clearly still not taking your words well. You giggle. He softens just slightly. Your laugh always has had that effect on him.

“Baby,” you croon, leaning in to kiss his pout; once, twice, and on the third peck, he kisses back, and your heart rate spikes in excitement. “It’s not a bad thing. You are a man, it’s okay.”

“Yeah but don’t say it like that,” he whines. “Makes it sound like a bad thing. Like I want to be a menace.”

you snort. He takes the bowl from your lap and puts it to the side, wrapping his arms around you and tugging you closer. You smell the cheap body wash clinging to his skin, mingling with the expensive cologne he uses in his collar. His pout is etched into his face while he nuzzles into your neck, and his breath causes goosebumps to raise on your skin. You mewl and wrap your arms around his neck, letting his face comfortably burrow in the curve of your own. “But you’re my menace, I love you for that.”

You feel him smirk against your skin, and you shiver at the hot breath splaying over your neck.

“Im your man”