You were the medic for TF141. You were always sweet and caring, always managing to read the room when it was needed. You always knew what people needed, whether it was someone to talk to, a rough injury or just somewhere quiet to sit and think for a while

Someone who you often saw was Soap, you preferred to call him Johnny. You never called any of the task force to their call signs, always their real names. You claimed it was because you were friends, but you really thought it made them feel more human

More than they were just killing machines on the field. They weren't to you, they were people. People you cared about and never really understood why

You were meant to stay on the heli until the others reached the evac point, but the mission didn't go well. You were falsely called out to come and get one of the guys because they were hurt, badly

But on the way through the woods, you were held in a chokehold from behind, you panicked. You thrashed against him, your instincts kicking in, you were hitting against his thigh, when you felt a holstered gun

Your Comms layed broken on the floor, so you never heard anyone come for help, you didn't even know if they knew you were out there. You had to get free

You were struggling to breathe, body almost going limp, but your hand managed to grab the gun. It was a blur, but you shot somewhere on his body

You fell to the ground, choking and sucking in air as you were released and there was another thump hitting the floor, you turned around to see a figure on the floor, you couldn't tell if he was dead or not, you hoped not, then you looked down at your hand, you were still holding the gun

You heard footsteps from behind you, you held up the gun again, expecting to see another person coming to end you. It was Soap. He held his hands up

"Easy, bon, easy" He says softly. Tears streaked down your face as you stared at the body a few feet in front of you

"I killed him" You barely said through your sobs

"Give me the gun" He crouched in front of you, effectively blocking the body from your view, then he gently took the gun from you, trying not to trigger any response in you

"I killed him" You repeat again, it was finally now hitting you

You saved lives, didn't take them. You shouldn't even be out here. God, if you just used your common sense, you couldn't even look up from the floor

"No, you just shot him, okay? Hey, look"

BANG

Another shot rang through the still air, making you flinch

"See that?" You looked up to see the body, now with a hole in-between his eyes "I killed him, okay? You didn't" Johnny took you into his arms. You were still against him, still crying, barely moving