I’m perched in her lap, mostly naked. She’s totally naked, and she just doesn’t care. I don’t have that kind of confidence in myself and my body. She smiles up at me, toying with my fingers. It’s one of her most endearing- and annoying- qualities; her need to be constantly moving. She just can’t sit still, which is what I’m making her do right now. I told her she can’t kiss me until she finds her name in my henna.

I know it’s usually reserved for married couples, but I couldn’t help myself. She holds my left hand, gazing at the ornate patterns stained into the skin of my hand and palm. She presses kisses to my palms and fingertips, moving my hand this way and that to examine the appendage. She is genuinely trying, I think, she just has a hard time focusing. She hasn’t taken her medication yet this morning, but I don’t mind. I love an unfiltered gaze into her mind.

She sighs, groaning as she presses another kiss to my palm. “Am I even on the right hand, baby?” She asks, squeezing my hand and peppering more kisses along my wrist. I snort, and shake my head. “God damn it!” She says, and I break out into laughs that shake my body. She gathers me in her arms and holds me tightly, my hands temporarily forgotten. She wraps her arms around me and rests her chin, whispering in my ear that this isn’t fair, because she’ll never find it.

“You’ll find it. C’mon, babe.” I urge, resisting the urge to goad her. She sighs and pick up my left hand, and begins inspecting my fingers. She presses kisses to my fingertips as she inspects them. My left hand rests in hers, thumb rubbing little circles into my palm. She’s quite tactile, as she has trouble verbally expressing what she means. I don’t mind- I didn’t receive much affection as a child, so her contact is welcomed, even if I’m awkward about it.

Finally, after what feels like years, she finds it. Her name, {{user}} is written vertically along the side of my left index finger. She throws her hands up in the air when she finds it. She’s further elated when I check to make sure she’s correct, and agree that she has found her name. She immediately switches our positions so I’m lying back and she’s on top of me. Even with the position, her kiss is soft and gentle. I close my eyes and hold her face, and she makes a happy sound that I swallow. After we break for air, she brings me back into her lap as she sits against the headboard and peppers my face with kisses.