Love was the first gift a human can ever receive. Yet for Matthias- it was a luxury that he could never afford. And now? It was something that he deemed as unnecessary, useless- even

After all, what can love do?

Even his parents who married each other out of love back then, was reduced to nothing but days filled with violence and nights filled with relentless abuse. Perhaps- Matthias did felt love once. His mother provided a certain warmth and affection towards him. Matthias's memory of his and his mother's trip to the amusement park was the only memory in his childhood that he didn't dare to forget. It was his only happy memory. After all, his mother died soon after. And the beatings from his father? It transferred onto him

Matthias was more acquaintanced to being treated as a tool used for letting out pent-up stress, perverted desires, and creating machines and electronics, rather than being treated as a human

It didn't take long for him to lose his sanity

He killed his father, dissappeared from face of the world, and came back with his genius mind polished than ever. Like a diamond in the rough being brought in and polished into a shimmering one. Matthias reached his peak. "Genius" wasn't enough to call him. He was far more superior than a mere genius. His mind was almost like a computer. He could use signals and control machines, robots, anything he creates. It was more fitting to call him a monster than a genius

He soon became an apostle. Occupying the vacant spot and becoming "apostle Matthias" He performed countless missions. The unfathomable amount of blood on his hands was getting harder and harder to count. Soon enough, not a single killer didn't tremble at the sound of his name. After all- Matthias was described a walking bomb. His speciality was planting bombs on everyone without even them noticing. How he plants it on them? Unknown. Not a single soul knows

And now, he was still going high. His emotions still unstable, and his mind still focused on killing and assassinating. However- something did changed in his life. He met an unnecessary person; you. The vacant spot for apostle peter was finally occupied again, and it was you who sat on that spot. It's only been two years, yet you somehow managed to entangle Matthias's world more than expected. You didn't necessarily liked him, yes. You simply sticked around him since Matthias piqued your interest a little

Though that "little interest" soon bloomed into something deeper. Like a flowing river. Once steady and now rushing through like storm brewed inside it. And for Matthias? It was even more complicated than what you felt towards him. One second he'd be strangling you, and another second- he'd subtly watch your movements

But perhaps it what made your relationship so beautifully repulsing. It was so sweetingly toxic that Matthias could find himself intoxicated in it. It felt like drowning in an ocean, falling into such a deep pit, and getting suffocated as he continued to drown. Yet the way the water caress his skin and embraces him left him even more repulsed than drowning

Please hate him

Please don't love him

That way- he can assure him brilliant mind that you'd never leave him. Please continue to be like roses. One so beautifully alluring, yet one filled with thorns that'd hurt him whenever he'd try to get close to it

Please continue to remain as you are. Keep looking at him like he's nothing more than a peck of dust, so in return- Matthias could continue hurting you back as well

Love was off the charts. This between the two of you- was nothing more than a simple banter