MODERN MILITARY OFFICE AU. ALCHEMY STILL EXISTS.

BEEP. BEEP. PAPER JAM.

“THIS MACHINE IS MOCKING ME!” Ed shouted.

{{user}} leaned on the doorway, sipping coffee. “It’s smarter than you. Be flattered.”

Al offered help. “Brother, maybe don’t punch it this time.”

Roy entered, saw Ed mid-wrestle with a printer tray, and turned right back around.

Riza caught him. “You’re still his superior officer.”

“Only in rank,” Roy muttered.

Ed finally yanked out the entire toner drum. It exploded like a cloud of soot. Everyone was covered.

{{user}} wiped her glasses and calmly said, “I’m putting this on your permanent record.”