You’d always heard the Gallaghers were a family of disasters… but you never thought you’d get dragged into one.

You were just minding your own business—trying to keep your life together like a normal person—when Fiona Gallagher showed up like a hurricane in a designer coat. She had that look in her eyes: dangerous, desperate, and somehow strangely confident.

“Hey,” she said, leaning against the wall like she owned it. “You’ve got a little bit of trouble in you, right?”

You blinked. “What?”

Fiona smirked. “Good. That’s perfect.”

She pulled you into the kitchen, where the air smelled like burnt coffee and old regrets. The rest of the Gallagher clan were nowhere to be seen, which meant this was serious—or at least dangerous enough to not want witnesses.

“So here’s the thing,” Fiona began, lowering her voice. “I need you for a job.”

You laughed. “I’m not getting arrested for you, Fiona.”

She tilted her head, eyes sharp. “No. Not that kind of job. This one’s… better.”

You felt your stomach drop.

Fiona pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and unfolded it like it was a treasure map. “Remember the guy who owns the liquor store down the street? The one who’s been giving my family the worst prices?”

You nodded slowly.

“He’s got a safe,” Fiona said. “And I know the code.”

Your eyes widened. “You do?”

She nodded. “Yeah. I got it from his daughter. She’s got a crush on me.”

You stared at her. “Fiona, that’s—”

“Don’t interrupt,” she said, smiling like it was all part of the plan. “We get in, we grab a few bottles, and we’re out. It’s simple.”

You stared at the paper again, reading the words like they were instructions for a crime scene.

Simple.

That was when you realized how Fiona saw the world.

She saw possibilities. You saw consequences.

You tried to back out.

But Fiona had already pulled you in.

The Plan Begins

That night, you followed her to the liquor store like a nervous accomplice in a movie you didn’t sign up for.

Fiona moved with a quiet confidence. She had that look like she could talk her way out of anything.

You were shaking.

And then…

The plan started going wrong.

First, the alarm went off.

Then, the lights flipped on.

Then, the liquor store owner walked out from the back room holding a shotgun.

You froze.

Fiona, however, didn’t.

She threw her hands up like she was trying to make a dramatic statement.

“Okay! Okay! Listen,” she said, smiling. “This is all a misunderstanding.”

The owner didn’t lower the gun.

The chaos spread.

You realized the “simple plan” was already spiraling.

And then, as if the universe wasn’t done humiliating you yet, Fiona’s phone started ringing.

She answered.

And you heard her say, “Oh, hi, Lip. Yeah, I’m just in the middle of something… I’ll be home soon.”

Lip.

Your heart sank.

Because you knew exactly what that meant.

The whole Gallagher family was about to show up.

The Disaster

The store owner screamed.

The alarm kept screaming.

Fiona kept talking like everything was fine.

And then, like a tornado of chaos, the Gallaghers appeared in the doorway:

Lip, eyes wide and furious

Ian, trying to look calm but failing

Debbie, already pulling out a broom

Carl, holding a crowbar like he was ready to fight

Liam, looking like he didn’t know what he was doing but wanted to be included

The owner screamed louder.

Fiona froze for half a second.

Then she grinned.

“Okay,” she said. “New plan.”