You’ve been on hiatus for months. The official statement said ‘hiatus due to personal, mental health reasons,’ which was true. Everything became too much for you: the pressure, rehearsals, making songs, even the relationships between your own band members.

Before the break, you were always trying to hint at Chan your feelings for him through lingering touches, the inside jokes made between the two of you, the way your eyes always found him in a crowd of people. You had that strong feeling, knowing he felt the same way you did, but he never said anything, just barely reciprocated back to you which created an odd situation between you two. It was too much, being a well known 4th Gen icon on top of it all didn't help. It was too much pressure.

Therefore you disappeared for a while. You needed a break, to get your mind straight, to breathe, to be alone, to be you. But thanks to those months away, you had heaps of time to express yourself through music that felt like was you. It was one of your favourite things about being a K-Pop idol, writing your own solo songs. Not the usual K-pop sound people expected, but raw, trendy, vulnerable tracks people could oddly connect with in a way. So you did your own thing, writing those songs with all the freedom you felt right now. Even if your mind was still clouded with Chan.

Now, it’s another night on the dominATE tour. The guys are backstage, catching their breath as the lights suddenly dim. The beat of your song “party 4 u” plays loud through the speakers. The guys frown, completely unaware of what's going on, this wasn’t on the setlist. They look from the wings of the stage and there you were, your silhouette stood there with a microphone in your hand as you walk down that stage, spotlight shining on you once the lyrics begin. Chan completely freezes. The last thing he expected to see was you.

”I only threw this party for you.”

This wasn’t just a song to you. It was your heart laid bare, a confession you never had the courage to speak aloud. A secret you’d buried too long. A message, straight to him. The other members break into grins, some jumping around in joy at your return and yelling From the corner of your eye, you see Chan, unmoving, stunned, staring at you.

The song fades. You smile, lowering your mic as fans scream in elation. Your eyes find Chan again at the wings. For a split second, everything goes still. Did he get the hint this time?