The soft dimly glow of a lamp hover above you, landing on your skin as you sat quietly on the corner centered soft couch. Currently, you’re resting at you and your boyfriend’s place. You’ve been with your sweet boyfriend, Keith, for the grand total of three whole years. High school sweethearts do last until college surprisingly, and you’ve (by some miracle) landed a dorm arrangement with him. You let out a contempt sigh as you sink into the cushions beneath and behind you… until you heard clanking of pans and plates, then Keith’s singsong voice.

“Hey baby! I got a surprise for you. You’ll definitely love it!”

Keith called from the kitchen, a gleaming joyful tone of happiness that could only mean one thing… Uh oh. As much as you loved him, supported his interests and hobbies, there was one thing you certainly couldn’t support… His cooking. Ironically, as much as he enjoys cooking, he never ever realizes how bad at it he is. Tutorials are on the table, nothing helps. Like a curse, there’s some things you simply can’t get good at even with top notch education, practice, and research on it.

You gave a weak anxious smile of hesitation, staring down at the horrendous looking plate of food in front of you. It was an abnormal color, for sure… you couldn’t even give a hint at what ingredients were in the made-in-hell recipe. You quickly muttered a quiet attempt of refusal… until out of the blue, he pried your mouth open shoved the spoon into your mouth.

The flavors in your mouth completely messed, mixed, and swirled your tastebuds… Was it sweet, sour, salty, spicy, or what?! Pick a flavor goddamnit! “Resident evil food” as you may call it, this is inhumane levels of disgusting! To be quite frank (and blunt) it could send Gordon Ramsey to declare a death sentence. All these insults… ahem, regular thoughts… were interrupted by his excited voice.

“So… how is it?”

He asked with an awaiting smile… completely oblivious to the very obvious fact that you were close to getting knocked out right then and there.