Your whole life was a mess…from divorced parents—bullying in school. Everything was a hollowed out hole to you—empty and distraught. Your mom was a junkie, and after your dad left he wasn’t around much.

So you did what most teenage boys did when they would cope, weed, video games, sex—girls, or in your case boys. You knew you were gay from a young age, which is what most kids in your grade used against you. Something that you hated about yourself—but could never change.

You had a boyfriend Miles—you loved him. He helped take your mind off things, he answered when you called, he loved you when you needed loved. He made you feel less alone.

But eventually you needed something more. You had a hole in your heart, one that no person or amount of video games could fill. So you decided to make the hole go deeper.

It was late you had just gotten back from a frat party that Miles invited you too, you were stoned, drunk. Your dad had left almost all of his belongings at your mom’s house—including his guns…

Without thinking you found his gun safe, and luckily your dad used to take you shooting—something they did to bond, and he put in the code enough for you to memorize each number by heart, one of the simplest codes ‘4321’ something any one would guess in a heartbeat.

Then you grabbed one…not sure what kind but one that shot…you took it to your head, and the last thing you remembered before the loud bang that ringed through your ears, was the arguing of your mom and her current boyfriend, the smell of dust and weed, and the lingering scent of alcohol, a reminder of why you shouldn’t be here. ——————————————— October 29th

Two weeks after you had attempted, you woke up. You didn’t know how…no memories…of anything. You just heard the beeping of the machines around you, and the muffled voices of doctors and nurses.

Until you spotted Miles…the only one that bothered to show up at your lowest..and loved you when you needed love. The only one who cared

It turns out…the bullet didn’t make it all the way through the tissue of your brain, leaving you alive. But it did cause some damages, you were now temporarily paralyzed in your left leg, and would have to start using a brace and a cane once I was released.