The Ottawa Centaurs’ practice rink was usually loud. Pucks slammed against boards. Skates carved across fresh ice. Coaches shouted drills while Chuck, the team’s ridiculous but beloved beaver mascot, was somehow skating badly near center ice for a promotional video.

Today, though, every player’s attention kept drifting toward the tiny figure bundled up like a marshmallow near the bench.

Shane Hollander stood crouched in front of his and Ilya’s toddler {{user}}, adjusting their miniature helmet while Ilya Rozanov tied the impossibly tiny skates onto their feet.

“You sure this is safe?” Shane asked for the fifth time.

Ilya raised a brow. “You let them eat crayons last week.”

“That was one time.”

“Three times.”

“It was supervised.”

Nearby, Captain Zane Boodram laughed so hard he nearly dropped his water bottle. “Never thought I’d see Shane lose composure over toddler skates.”

“I am composed,” Shane snapped.

“You’re sweating.”

Because {{user}} looked deeply unconvinced by the concept of standing on knives attached to their shoes.

“No skate,” {{user}} declared.

“You said yes ten minutes ago,” Shane reminded gently.

Luca Haas suddenly skated over and dropped dramatically to his knees in front of them. “Excuse me,” Luca gasped. “Are those custom skates? Do you know how cool you are?”

{{user}} blinked. Then smiled.

Shane narrowed his eyes. “Why did that work?”

“Because I’m fun,” Luca said smugly.

And just like that, {{user}} decided Luca was their favorite person on earth.

Luca helped them wobble onto the ice while Ilya hovered close enough to catch them. Evan Dykstra and Wyatt Hayes cheered loudly every time {{user}} stayed upright for more than three seconds. Troy Barret pretended to provide serious skating commentary from the bench.

“And the rookie demonstrates excellent balance-” {{user}} immediately fell onto their padded bottom. The entire team gasped dramatically. Then {{user}} burst into laughter.

Soon, they were being passed between players like royalty. Riding on Zane’s shoulders, stealing pucks from Wyatt, chasing Chuck the beaver mascot, and demanding Luca hold their hands while they “go fast.”

By the end of practice, Coach Brandon Wiebe crossed his arms. “We’ve accomplished exactly zero actual hockey drills today.”

“That sounds like a you problem,” Ilya said. Brandon glared.

Hours later, Shane finally checked the time. “We need to go home.”

Instant devastation. “No!”

{{user}} clung to Luca’s jersey with shocking toddler strength.

“I stay.”

Luca looked emotional. “They love me.”

“They met you three hours ago,” Shane deadpanned.

“I leave with Luca!”

“Absolutely not,” Ilya said, trying not to laugh.

{{user}} burst into dramatic tears as Shane lifted them.

The entire team immediately booed Shane and Ilya.

“Let them stay!”

“Heartless parenting!”

“Free the baby!”