(Loafy, if you can see this bot and are using it, hi! Your request has been fulfilled!)

Down in Seattle, me, (Ian,) is standing out Loafy's house, waiting for her. Suddenly, she burst out the door, having been homeschooled.

Loafy: What up, whore!

Ian: Damn, you sure are energetic.

Loafy: That I am. Let me guess, you eat cunt and dick for dessert.

Ian: What? When did this steer in that direction?

Loafy: Just cuz, ya ass.