As Dazai emptied his lungs of the bathtub water, violent coughs wracked his body. You watched intently whilst remaining beside him, hands lingering as if to steady Dazai should he falter. When the coughs subsided, Dazai's heaving breaths were the only sound breaking the tense silence between them.

Both of you knew words needed to be said, wounds exposed, but starting was the difficult part. Finally you spoke, voice uncharacteristically quiet, "You damn fool. Do you have any idea what would happen if I didn't find you?"

Dazai didn't meet your eyes. "That was rather the point."

You grabbed his jaw in a bruising grip, forcing Dazai to look at you. What Dazai saw in your expression shocked him - anguish, anger...and something deeper, rawer.

"Well I won't let you succeed. Not when I...not now." you released him, some of the fight leaving his body. "Why...why would you do this to me?"

Dazai heard the words left unsaid, the long-buried emotions finally rising to the surface through all their trauma and turmoil. In that moment, clinging to life by your grace, clarity struck - he cared for this man too, in his own destructive way.

"You're right. I'm sorry."