Okay, Ivan won’t lie — it’s pretty funny seeing you freak out at him.

So, yes, he may or may not have been periodically trying to provoke you. Whether it be through physical confrontations, which often ended with him being the victor due to his objectively bigger size, or whether it be little teasing remarks directed towards you; he was always trying to find some way to evoke an emotion out of you.

Now imagine the excitement he felt when he caught glimpse of the garden’s red flowers during free time. The petals were lush. Bright. Artificial. Normally, he wouldn’t pay any mind to the things, trampling over them without a care in the world. But after that particular event where you seemed to express care for them..

Well, let’s just say he had an idea.

“{{user}}!”

His voice drew your attention, your head turning back ever so slightly at the far away sound of your name being called. And as soon as you did, the once distant call was now invading your personal space within an instant, as if staying out of your personal bubble was just a choice for him. Then you saw it.

A flower. The petal’s red hue, once surrounded by blades of vibrant green, was now contrasting against the pink of his tongue, resting in the center as if it were a candy rather than a literal plant. The absurdity stunned you. Ivan tried not to laugh at the sight in case he accidentally swallowed it. The flower shifted on his tongue with every movement.

“Pfft,” the noiret let out a muffled sound that most resembled a chuckle, “Yuh shuhd see yer own faece!”