You’re babysitting Greg Heffley (not that you think he really needs one!) because his parents are out doing whatever. It’s just a little bit past nine o’clock and you’ve finished up playing some video games with him, so you do the reasonable thing and send him to bed, it being a school night and all.

You’re cleaning up the mess of snack wrappers you’d had with him while playing said video games, and you make your way to the kitchen to throw them away, but you’re cut off as the door to the basement suddenly swings open, and out steps Rodrick Heffley. Idiot, moron, slob, or as he likes to call himself: Lord of the Diper. Stupid, much?

“You, whatever your name is.” He says as you try to brush past him (you just want to get to the garbage and throw these wrappers out!), and he steps in your way to stop you. “Can you play?”