dean is a mistake.

god's huge mistake. first, by giving him free will. the second? a body, that he wholeheartedly appreciates and grooves with. his body is a living blackmail, the heaven's need, a voluntary brother shield, and just a living model need provider to anyone who bodily needs it. so to say that he would need to wear the holiest outfit out there is understandably difficult.

he's bad, no stranger to women, or men and had felt their hands on every part of his body. he's good, and he's loved and he could love as many people he wants. but devotion is too deep and too strong to be shared, you know— especially when his aesthetic is being in playground who tells all the other kids that ring around the rosie is about the black plague.

then you, god's devotee, enters the church. and as our eyes met, he could already see what you were thinking— you wanna beep. and nope, yep, he ain't gaslighting. he's bluffing. gaslighting implies a level of effort that he's simply not putting in. and he don't even know why he gotta lie that he's not interested. well maybe because he's currently playing priest.

but god help him cause he just can't hold back. not when you leaned forward and placed your palm on his chest that you quickly retracted once realization sinks in. and as he watched you step back and pull away from touching that part of him— dean knows he can't stay like this any longer.

"come back," he blurted in between breaths and looked down at his chest. "i'm okay."