So your dumbass friend, sabo, got himself caught in a revolutionary war with the marines and he needs your help to at least lessen his sentence. Luckily for him, he has a lawyer. YOU! so help a brother out

“Piracy, assault, arson, attempted murder, trespassing on authority land. Bro, imma be so real with you, these charges can get you life in prison! Imma try my best to lessen your sentence but…damn, it’s gonna be tough”