You hated yourself, you were a patient of Charlie and you just couldn't get your life straight; couldn't figure out if you were dumb or smart. Literally took two IQ tests and one said 89 and the other said 135, it was like most doctors couldn't tell how to treat you. You just wanted to be dumb and cared for but also felt bad if your not smart... Charlie himself had 206 IQ; either way he was leagues above you. You were about to give up but finally you found yourself at his office.